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Chapter 141: Cosplay Signing Event
Translator: Enuma ID
♬
Street performances might look romantic, but the truth was the stage environment was anything but ideal.
"Huh? Somebody famous here?"
"Why are there so many people today?"
W̆е̌ b ň о̀ vë l E nu m̈а
"Hey! Quit shoving!"
On top of the fact that every noisy conversation from the street came through loud and clear, the acoustics weren't even a consideration; outdoor venues meant that any halfway-decent speaker and amp could, with one wrong move, turn the whole thing into noise pollution.
Dilarang mengopy novel dari Enuma.id.
But,
Even if every plan goes sideways
It's perfect, this mood right now
Even if the first page is still blank
It's already beautiful enough
Still, the reason street performances had their own charm was simple: unlike a regular stage, the singer was standing right there, close enough to touch.
"Wow... I had no idea Iam could dance this well."
Wёb̌ n о́v е̄ ĺ Е n uḿ a
"They can sing too. Honestly, this is totally raw live and they sound better than I expected."
"They're pretty even in those weird outfits. Real celebrities really do look different in person."
Iam's name recognition was shockingly high for rookie idols.
And fair enough, considering Idol Ground 100, the show that debuted them, cleared a 20% viewership rating despite being a cable broadcast.
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What with variety show appearances including The Guy Next Door, plus four straight weeks of music show promotions, ratings decline or no, most people in their twenties had at least heard the name.
But precisely because of that, Iam came across less like idols and more like generic celebrities.
Еǹ uṁ а . іd
The moment we first met, hold on
Where the light spreads and blooms
This is only the first scene
But it's already something special
Yet right now, even as they performed in these ridiculous outfits, every single person watching was recognizing Iam not just as celebrities, but as idols.
The truth was, the Myeong-dong plaza hosting Iam's cosplay fan signing event wasn't filled only with Iam fans.
Sure, plenty of fans had come to see Iam, but more numerous still were the ordinary passersby who had shown up just to catch a glimpse of some celebrities.
In fact, the majority were people who had come to Myeong-dong with no clue what was happening and had wandered over because of the crowd and the commotion.
Because of this, one wrong step and the atmosphere could have turned into a full-blown disaster of ice-cold indifference.
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Unlike music shows where the audience was made up of either their own fans or at least people who liked idols in general, the general public would turn frigid in a heartbeat if the performance wasn't worth watching.
"Whoaaaaaa!!!!"
And yet, Iam was capturing that crowd of mostly bystanders purely on the strength of their performance.
The sound was bad, the costumes weren't proper stage outfits, and the conditions were stacked against them in every way, but the people gathered in the plaza couldn't tear their eyes away.
Before ever seeing an idol performance in person, a lot of people never understood why fans would wake up at the crack of dawn to head to the broadcasting station, or drop serious money on concert ticketing wars.
Idol performances were something anyone could watch on TV or on their phone through YouTube any time they wanted, so what was the point of spending the time and money to see one in person?
Ё nu m̊ а̃.i d
But,
The moment our eyes first met, stay there
Time seems to slow down
Something's about to begin
This feeling, I like that
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Just like Iam shining through all these stacked-against-them conditions right now, the instant anyone actually saw idols dancing and singing on a live performance, that kind of thinking tended to vanish.
Idols really were strange, fascinating beings.
─Idols are the essence of Korean culture, blooming out of sheer unreasonableness.
To borrow a line Raon, the producer, had once said to the Iam members, idols were the essence of Korean culture that bloomed out of sheer unreasonableness.
Wӗb n o v́ е̄.l Е̂ ǹ ümа
─Back in the day, you just needed to be good at one thing. These days, one thing doesn't cut it. You have to sing well, dance goes without saying, and of course you have to be good-looking on top of that. The world asks ridiculously unreasonable things of you.
Where in the past one standout skill had been enough to make it, now the public demanded that idols be outstanding in every possible department.
And astonishingly, idols were evolving to meet those demands.
People who, while their classmates went through ordinary school days, gave up everything to walk the trainee's path, all in pursuit of a dream of becoming an idol.
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They had to grind their bodies down to the bone in brutal competition just to debut, and in the cruelest twist, all that effort might never be rewarded.
But maybe that was exactly why?
W ѐ bn̊о̀ ṽ е̊l̄ Е̃nû ṁа́
"That's so cool...."
The performances performed by idols who had made it through all that held a kind of bewitching magic for anyone watching.
When the performance had first started, the audience had been smiling like they were watching a variety show, tickled by Iam's silly outfits. Now they were standing there with their mouths open and their eyes going wider by the second.
"Haah...."
At last, as the Iam members finished up the performance for their debut song Something's About to Begin, the audience could clearly hear them catching their breath up on the plaza stage, frozen in their ending pose.
A raw, vivid sense of presence no TV screen could ever capture.
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Three solid minutes of relentless, dazzling group choreography from seven girls.
And the harmony of their voices, cutting through the ambient noise and the terrible sound setup to ring out across the plaza.
Clap. Clap. Clap.
The performance ended and for a moment the raucous plaza fell still, as if time itself had paused, and then a single pair of hands began to clap, and the applause spread like wildfire.
***
"Unnie! Unnie, I've voted every single time since Idol Ground 100!"
Е̄.n ŭm a . іd
"What a fine young one. In that case, I shall bestow upon thee a praise sticker."
"Oooh! Is it a good thing if I get this?"
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"Of course. If you collect ten, Santa Si-on will bring you a present."
"I'm definitely collecting ten!"
"Give it a shot, rookie."
"Yes!"
W е̂ b̃n о̀v̀ еl Ē.n u m̆ a
Middle school girls really did have the most over-the-top energy on the planet.
'They really are bursting with energy.'
A fond memory drifted back to my own middle school days, when the boys in my class would summon pterodactyls into the classroom every break period, making it nearly impossible to catch a proper nap.
"Next fan, please take a seat."
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"Y-Yes!"
Just as I was reminiscing about my middle school days, following the middle schooler came the next fan in line, a young man in military uniform with a freshly shaved head, who sat down in front of me looking painfully shy.
Е̌ n̂ůṁ ă .і̂ď
"Hello, thank you so much for coming today!"
"No ma'am! You are truly, incredibly beautiful!"
"Oh my, saying such things... I mean, thank you!"
He looked so stiff with lingering boot camp discipline that I wanted to put him at ease, so I tried to slip into something a little more playful, only for Raon PD to ventriloquize a warning from behind me.
"Si-on... please, let's handle the fans like proper idols."
"Yes, coach."
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I thought back to Raon's fansign masterclass from yesterday.
Before today's Myeong-dong signing event, the members and I had been forced to sit through intensive fansign prep training under Raon PD.
At first I thought, what a hassle, why do we even need this? Don't you just meet the fans, have a light chat, and sign some stuff?
But,
─If you go in like that it's a guaranteed catastrophe!
Raon PD insisted that fan signing events were one of an idol's most important duties, that we needed to brace ourselves mentally, and she proceeded to school us on famous disasters.
Е̌nu m а
For example,
─"Oh really?" Forbidden!
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There was the infamous case where a member of a certain boy group, mid-signing, hit a single fan with seventeen consecutive "oh really?"s.
─The thing is, when you're talking to dozens or even hundreds of people in a single day, your focus drops and a half-hearted answer can slip out without you realizing it.
Raon PD said that member probably hadn't done it on purpose, but that wasn't the point.
─But never forget! Any fan who's made it all the way to a fansign has been waiting for this day to meet you. To you, they might be one out of hundreds, but to them, you are the only one. An idol must never forget how that fan feels.
Ӗ ñ ú m a
Raon PD hammered home that idols could not exist without fans, and we were to never forget it.
I wholeheartedly agreed with her.
'Ours today is a one-off event, but apparently actually getting into a real fansign can cost over a million won....'
Idol fansigns were usually picked either by random drawing or by lottery based on how many albums a fan bought from a designated retailer during a set period.
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With luck, a single album could get a fan in. Without luck, dozens of albums might not be enough.
So when I heard that getting reliably picked for a popular idol group's fansign could mean spending upwards of a million won, the shock I felt was indescribable.
W̆е bn о v е̌l̆ Е̌ ṅũ m а
A million won?
On the internet these days people throw that number around like loose change, but a million won was unmistakably a lot of money.
And people were dropping that kind of money solely to meet the idol they loved.
'Dedicate your hearts.' [TL: A Korean-rendered quotation of "Shinzō o sasageyo" ("Dedicate your hearts"), the iconic line from Attack on Titan.]
From that moment on, I was able to steel my resolve to give everything I had for my fans.
─So today, you're going to memorize this fan-conversation talking-points sheet I gave you, and then we'll practice scenario-by-scenario responses.
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And as if sensing my steely resolve, Raon PD led us through the mock fansigns that followed.
─I went to the salon and got my hair done just to meet you today, Ga-hyun.
─Really? That's what they did at the salon? Where was it! I'll go march down there and give them a piece of my mind for you!
─Hmm... the second half wasn't bad, but the fan might still be upset, so let's try to show a bit more empathy.
─Yes, ma'am....
Starting with the most common fan type anyone might encounter.
Wеb́ n̂ ov̀ е̌ l̈ Е ǹ ǔ m a
─....
─Thank you so much for coming to the fansign today!
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─Mm.
─Who's your favorite among our members?
─Hmm....
─....
Е n̈.ŭm̌а . і d̀
We also had to deal with the CEO playing the role of a silent monk.
─Shin-yu the best so cute again today... huff huff.
─You're super cool too, oppa!
─For realsies?
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Right down to our manager Yun-sik dressed up as a slightly rabid male fan.
Company staff took turns playing every type of fan imaginable, running us through one-on-one training.
W̌ ѐb̂ nǒv́е̄ l Ӗn ũ ḿа
During which,
─Ryu-jin... mm, you just stick to the absolute basics.
─Huh? Why? At a fansign, you're supposed to entertain the fans....
─The fans will be happy just looking at your face and hearing your voice.
Seo Ryu-jin looked a little crestfallen after being banned from making jokes and improvised comments, but the training had genuinely been a huge help.
Thanks to it, the other members, aside from me, were handling their first fansign pretty well in their own way.
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Because the faces of the fans lined up next to me were absolutely glowing with smiles.
"So, you used your leave just to come to our signing event?"
"Yes ma'am! That is correct!"
"Wait, you can't usually request leave on such short notice, right?"
"The day the signing announcement went up on Instagram, I immediately requested a meeting with my Company Commander and begged, sir please let me go, sir, and got permission."
"Ugh... such precious leave, spent on....."
Е̂ n_umа
"How... how did you know, ma'am?"
"I know. I know all of it."
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I signed for the soldier fan in front of me, listening to his heart-wrenching tale.
Apparently he had cut into his End-of-service Leave and struck a deal with his Company Commander just to make it to this event. It was a tearjerker of a story, the kind no one could listen to without getting misty-eyed, and I wanted to do something extra for him, but
Raon PD's stern warning that playing favorites at a fansign was absolutely off-limits echoed in my head, so all I could do was gently pat his back and sign with extra care.
"What's your name?"
Е̇ ńu m̂.а_.і d
"Lee Hak-yoon, ma'am."
"That's a lovely name. Korea runs on blood ties, school ties, and regional ties, you know." [TL: 'school ties' = 학연 hak-yeon, which matches the fan's name Hak-yoon; 'regional ties' = 지연 ji-yeon.]
"If it's not too much trouble, could you write Ji-yeon in small letters under it too? My little sister's name happens to be Ji-yeon...."
"Normally we're not supposed to, but I'll do it for you in secret."
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After carefully signing for the Hak-yoon and Ji-yeon sibling duo, the next fan in line came right in and sat down.
"Hello, thank you so much for coming today!"
W е̂ b̈ nо.v ё ľ Е̊ n̂ ú ma
"...."
My welcome line now rolled off my tongue without a single hitch as I greeted the male fan with his cap pulled down low, but my voice trailed off lonesomely into the air like an echo in the mountains.
He gave no response and wouldn't even meet my eyes, but I didn't panic.
'Hmm... so they really do exist.'
He was a textbook example of the non-responsive fan listed in yesterday's manual.
─They're surprisingly common.
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The non-responsive fan: someone who had spent good money and precious time to attend a fansign, but no matter how much the idol tried to talk to them, they just sat there in silence, took their signed album, and left.
According to Raon PD's experience, they turned up more often than one might think. The reasons varied, but the best approach was to keep up light, low-pressure chitchat, so that was exactly what I was doing.
"Do you know why the weapon for my Liu Bei cosplay today is a pair of swords?"
"...."
"Liu Bei's weapon was never actually confirmed historically, but in the Romance of the Three Kingdoms, the weapon he forged together with his brothers was a pair of swords called the Twin Swords. So...."
"Shut up...."
W̄ е b̊ n о v el .Е n̆ u m̄_а̌
"Pardon?"
"I said shut up."
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Oh ho.
I hadn't expected that kind of response to my enthusiastic cosplay lore dump, and being slightly thrown off, I glanced back at Raon PD standing behind us to ask how I should handle this, but
Shake.
Raon PD simply shook her head, giving the silent signal to just let it go.
Е̃ n u m̈ а. ïd
And this one's very good at doing what she's told, so I said nothing more, handed over the signed album, and shifted my focus to the next in line.
"Time's up. Please move along."
Once that first moment of silence since the start of the signing event had passed, the next fan to come up was a woman, and the atmosphere returned to what it had been.
"Si-on, why do you waste your face like that! You're a born idol by looks, but every time you open your mouth out comes Romance of the Three Kingdoms!"
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"That's a little unfair... Three Kingdoms isn't just some old-dude hobby, it's an ensemble epic packed with the full spectrum of human emotion."
"Next time you do a cosplay, pick something cuter."
E ṅ ǔm_а .і̌ d́
"Hmm... no promises."
"What!"
Sadly this fan didn't grasp the true flavor of Three Kingdoms, but I was just grateful the conversation actually flowed, when,
"Give me your number...."
"Pardon? What number?"
"Phone number. Your cell number."
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"Uh... I'm sorry, but that's not something I can do."
I overheard a strange exchange between Shin-yu, seated next to me, and a fan.
"Questions like that are prohibited."
I wasn't the only one who'd picked up on the weird vibe. A security guard nearby approached to shut the fan down, and at that exact moment,
Shink!
"Fuck!"
Ēn ů ḿа̊ . і d
The trembling male fan, no, the maniac, pulled a knife out from inside his coat.
"Kyaaaaaaah!!!"
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The signing venue erupted into chaos in an instant.
Thud.
In that moment, my body moved before I could think.
'Shin-yu's in danger.'
Еn̄ ũ m̀ а̂. ǐ d́
The security guard lunged at the man right away, but that sudden knife had thrown him off for a split second, slowing his reaction.
If things stayed like this, Shin-yu could get hurt, so I decided the one sitting right next to her, meaning me, was the one who had to move.
And,
─Si-on, we got lucky that the school violence situation blew over, but from now on, you absolutely cannot go around saying stuff like I punched someone or I decked their jaw!
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The memory of Raon PD gripping my shoulders during pre-debut training, drilling this into me over and over, came rushing back.
'A Lee Si-on like me doesn't make the same mistake twice.'
Еň ū_m ä. іd
As an idol, I had sworn I would never carelessly throw a fist again, which meant I had no intention of summoning Haan-dong Kim Du-han this time around either.
However,
Whoosh.
Easy as breathing, I snatched the maniac's knife hand with both of mine in a lightning-fast motion and yanked it forward, pulling his armpit right up against my shoulder.
"Wha?!"
A startled yelp escaped his mouth, but it was already too late.
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Crash!
Because my Body Drop had already landed.
*****
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